Wednesday, 2 January 2013

H is for... Heartbroken



BROKEN BOYS

Look back, tread with care, always watch your step:
Land locked, I made ribbons of my feet,
Kissed fingertips with peeling glue.
Boys want to be broken, smashed -
Puzzle over pieces,
Dream in smithereens -
Not instructions.
All those shards:
One man,
Then.

Now,
One man.
All those shards
(Not instructions).
Dream in smithereens,
Puzzle over pieces.
Boys want to be broken; smashed
Kissed fingertips. With peeling glue,
Land locked, I made ribbons of my feet.
Look back, tread with care: always watch your step.

2 comments:

  1. As you can tell, I'm still in a bit of a downbeat mood! This started as a few whiney notes, then I played with it and made it into a writing experiment, diminishing by a syllable with each line, but it was all too bleak. Then looking at it again, I found that if I mirrored the poem back on itself, it gave an altogether more positive start to the year.
    Don't ask me what it all means, it's a bit crackers and I'm not entirely sure of the answer...
    I would recommend a little mental challenge / trick with number of syllables or form if you're a bit stuck on how to progress an idea. It's fun to see what pops out.

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  2. Very clever Zoe, lovely that it came out of an experiment and fashioned itself into a visually and emotionally captivating poem! I like the timer implying that time heals - I'll say it again, very clever! The words can be read so effectively both ways too - and the first and last lines are perfect in the different contents of bitterness and hope.

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